It was a Beautiful Day…
One sunny afternoon, my wife wanted to grill some chicken outside on the grill. Now this is usually my job, due to I’m the guy and that’s just how it works. Anyway, it’s a time that I can play with fire and not get into too much trouble. But this day there was something going on and I wasn’t going to be able to grill the chicken right then. She asked, “How long do I cook the chicken on each side” Some of you, when you read that question immediately said,”six times with the grill set to 425 degrees”, others responded like I did. My reply was, “I don’t know exactly”.
A Storm started brewing and then the fight started.
Her next question was, “Well, then how many times do I turn them?” getting flustered at this idiot she married and again, “I don’t know exactly, just until they’re done.” Let me preface this with the fact that I tend to be a little sarcastic most of the time and some days I’m a lot sarcastic pretty much all the time. This was not one of those days. Really, it wasn’t.
I was truly not being sarcastic or being obstinate. Don’t get me wrong, there are days when I annoy her just because I can. Actually, I was reeling from the fact that she was mad and getting madder. This exchange went on for quite a while.
I grill by feel, that’s just how I do it. It’s a gift, what can I say. Now, I will tell you that we had been married for nearly ten years when this happened. It was not until that very day that realized. She and I communicate VERY differently. I am a high D and I, which makes me, we’ll say a little impulsive. She hasn’t taken a profile (yet) but I promise, she is a C. Extremely analytical and likes to have specific instructions for things she hasn’t done before. I never claimed to be that bright and I married up for sure, but it finally clicked that she was not picking up what I was laying down, to quote a friend of mine.
Now, you’re asking yourself, what does this have to do with me?” I’ll give a little insight. Have you ever dealt with a person at work, church, or the place where you volunteer that you just seem to not be able to get along with. Someone who it seems speaks another language than you do? You can attribute this communication breakdown to different personalities and personality styles. We all communicate differently and this creates tension.
Shortly after the “Chicken fiasco of 2010” as it was later dubbed, I took a personality profile. Specifically, the DISC profile (affiliate link) This opened my eyes to how different personalities communicate. As I said earlier, I am a high D and I, which is an “Influencer”. This is pretty accurate considering my background in sales and training. Go ahead, click that link and take your profile, it’s money well spent, especially if it can keep you out of trouble with the Mrs.
There are other benefits:
- You not only will you understand how you communicate, but how other personality types understand you
- You will be able to communicate more effectively with your different personality types
- You will understand more quickly what features and benefits your customer is looking for
There are so many benefits to understanding how you communicate with others. The sooner you learn to recognize the different personality types, the sooner you can relieve some of the stress in your life. I know it’s helped me immensely.
There isn’t a silver bullet to learning this, but if you start by taking your own personality profile you will be one step ahead in this game. If your new understanding can help you help one more person, won’t it be worth it?
Have you ever experienced your own Chicken Fiasco?